<P> Outwardly, Scarlett is the picture of southern charm and womanly virtues, and a popular belle with the country males . The one man she truly wants, however, is her neighbor, Ashley Wilkes--the one man she can't have . The Wilkes family has a tradition of intermarrying with their cousins, and Ashley is promised to his cousin, Melanie Hamilton of Atlanta . Scarlett's motivation in the early part of the novel centers on her desire to win Ashley's heart . When he refuses her advances (which no well - bred Southern lady would be so forward as to make), she takes refuge in childish rage, and spitefully accepts the proposal of Charles Hamilton, Melanie's brother, in a misguided effort to get back at Ashley and Melanie . </P> <P> Rhett Butler, a wealthy older bachelor and a society pariah, overhears Scarlett express her love to Ashley during a barbecue at Twelve Oaks, the Wilkes' estate . Rhett admires Scarlett's willfulness and her departure from accepted propriety as well as her beauty . He pursues Scarlett, but is aware of her impetuousness, childish spite, and her fixation on Ashley . He assists Scarlett in defiance of proper Victorian mourning customs when her husband, Charles Hamilton, dies in a training camp, and Rhett encourages her hoydenish behavior (by antebellum custom) in Atlanta society . Scarlett, privately chafing from the strict rules of polite society, finds friendship with Rhett liberating . </P> <P> The Civil War sweeps away the lifestyle for which Scarlett was raised, and Southern society falls into ruin . Scarlett, left destitute after Sherman's army marches through Georgia, becomes the sole source of strength for her family . Her character begins to harden as her relatives, the family slaves and the Wilkes family look to her for protection from homelessness and starvation . Scarlett becomes money - conscious and more materialistic in her motivation to ensure that her family survives and Tara stays in her family, while other Georgia planters are losing their homes . This extends to stealing her younger sister's fiancé, going into business herself (well - bred southern ladies never worked outside the home), engaging in controversial business practices and even exploiting convict labor in order to make her lumber business profit . Her conduct results in the accidental death of her second husband, Frank Kennedy, and shortly after she marries Rhett Butler for "fun" and because he is very wealthy . </P> <P> Scarlett is too insecure and vain to truly grow up and realize her pursuit of Ashley is misdirected until the climax of the novel . With the death of Melanie Wilkes, she realizes her pursuit of Ashley was a childish romance . She realizes she never really loved Ashley and that she has loved Rhett Butler for some time . She pursues Rhett from the Wilkes home to their home, only to discover he has given up hope of ever receiving her love, and is about to leave her . After telling him she loves him, he refuses to stay with her, which leads to the famous line, "Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn ." Wracked with grief, but determined to once again pursue and win her man, realizing that Tara is what matters most to her (other than Rhett) Scarlet returns home to Tara to launch her pursuit of Rhett at a later time . </P>

Who does scarlett end up with in gone with the wind