<P> Scarlett O'Hara is an atypical protagonist, especially as a female romantic lead in fiction . When the novel opens, Scarlett is sixteen . She is vain, self - centered, and very spoiled by her wealthy parents . She can also be insecure, but is very intelligent, despite her fashionable Southern - belle pretense at ignorance and helplessness around men . She is somewhat unusual among Southern women, whom society preferred to act as dainty creatures who needed protection from their men . Scarlett is aware that she is only acting empty - headed, and resents the fashionable "necessity" of it, unlike most of her typical party - going Southern belles social set . </P> <P> Outwardly, Scarlett is the picture of southern charm and womanly virtues, and a popular belle with the country males . The one man she truly wants, however, is her neighbor, Ashley Wilkes--the one man she can't have . The Wilkes family has a tradition of intermarrying with their cousins, and Ashley is promised to his cousin, Melanie Hamilton of Atlanta . Scarlett's motivation in the early part of the novel centers on her desire to win Ashley's heart . When he refuses her advances (which no well - bred Southern lady would be so forward as to make), she takes refuge in childish rage, and spitefully accepts the proposal of Charles Hamilton, Melanie's brother, in a misguided effort to get back at Ashley and Melanie . </P> <P> Rhett Butler, a wealthy older bachelor and a society pariah, overhears Scarlett express her love to Ashley during a barbecue at Twelve Oaks, the Wilkes' estate . Rhett admires Scarlett's willfulness and her departure from accepted propriety as well as her beauty . He pursues Scarlett, but is aware of her impetuousness, childish spite, and her fixation on Ashley . He assists Scarlett in defiance of proper Victorian mourning customs when her husband, Charles Hamilton, dies in a training camp, and Rhett encourages her hoydenish behavior (by antebellum custom) in Atlanta society . Scarlett, privately chafing from the strict rules of polite society, finds friendship with Rhett liberating . </P> <P> The Civil War sweeps away the lifestyle for which Scarlett was raised, and Southern society falls into ruin . Scarlett, left destitute after Sherman's army marches through Georgia, becomes the sole source of strength for her family . Her character begins to harden as her relatives, the family slaves and the Wilkes family look to her for protection from homelessness and starvation . Scarlett becomes money - conscious and more materialistic in her motivation to ensure that her family survives and Tara stays in her family, while other Georgia planters are losing their homes . This extends to stealing her younger sister's fiancé, going into business herself (well - bred southern ladies never worked outside the home), engaging in controversial business practices and even exploiting convict labor in order to make her lumber business profit . Her conduct results in the accidental death of her second husband, Frank Kennedy, and shortly after she marries Rhett Butler for "fun" and because he is very wealthy . </P>

In gone with the wind who does scarlett o'hara first marry