<P> Gibbs has been married four times, and divorced three (his first wife was killed). </P> <Ul> <Li> Shannon - In the episode "Heartland", Gibbs is revealed by flashbacks to have met his first wife, Shannon (portrayed in that episode by Aviva), while waiting at the Stillwater train platform in 1976, where she tells him about her rules for life that would inspire a similar set of Gibbs' own that he now teaches to his subordinate agents at NCIS . In "Hiatus (Part II)", they were stated to have married in April 1982, and Kelly (Mary Mouser) was born in July 1983 . He was unable to be at the birth of Kelly as he was deployed . Shannon, along with their eight - year - old daughter Kelly, was murdered by a Mexican drug dealer named Pedro Hernandez on the last official day of Operation Desert Storm . Gibbs was an active member of the Marine Corps at the time and was still overseas when they were killed . In "Hiatus (Part II)" Director Shepard tells Dr. Donald "Ducky" Mallard that Shannon had witnessed a murder of a Marine at Camp Pendleton, where Gibbs was based at that time . Shannon had identified the murderer as Mexican - born drug dealer Pedro Hernandez . Afterwards, Hernandez shot the NIS agent driving Shannon and Kelly in a minivan and the subsequent crash took their lives . Gibbs retaliated by seeking out Pedro and assassinating him in cold blood, leaving behind an empty shell casing as a message . This secret remained with him for 20 years until it came to light when Abby discovered the truth through a forensic investigation . </Li> <Li> Diane Sterling (Melinda McGraw), was Gibbs' second wife . After divorcing Gibbs she married FBI Senior Special Agent Tobias Fornell (Joe Spano). However, this marriage was only slightly more positive than her last, and ultimately failed . As she did with Gibbs, Diane drained Fornell's bank account when she left him . Fornell and Diane have a daughter, Emily . In the season 9 episode "Devil's Triangle", Gibbs tells Diane that he liked her--he always liked her, and still likes her . (Diane tells him their marriage fell apart because she was in love with him, but she could not compete with Shannon .) Diane is later shot dead by terrorist Sergei Mishnev (Alex Veadov) during the Season 12 episode "Check". </Li> <Li> Rebecca (Jeri Ryan), Gibbs' third wife, is introduced in season 12 . She and Gibbs divorced because Rebecca cheated on Gibbs and it is revealed in that season's episode 11 that she is marrying the man with whom she cheated on Gibbs . </Li> <Li> Gibbs' most recent wife, Stephanie Flynn (Kathleen York), also a redhead, lived with him during his service in Moscow, Russia, for about a year . According to Gibbs, she was the one who left him . The reason for this was revealed in the Season 3 episode "Mind Games", where Ducky noted Gibbs became so obsessed with catching a serial killer it incited the collapse of their marriage, which happened no later than 1995, the year Gibbs captured the criminal . She is also said in the Season 1 episode, "Hung Out to Dry", to get drunk and dial Gibbs incessantly on the day of their former wedding anniversary, which causes him to aggressively disable or even ruin his phones to shut her out . </Li> </Ul> <Li> Shannon - In the episode "Heartland", Gibbs is revealed by flashbacks to have met his first wife, Shannon (portrayed in that episode by Aviva), while waiting at the Stillwater train platform in 1976, where she tells him about her rules for life that would inspire a similar set of Gibbs' own that he now teaches to his subordinate agents at NCIS . In "Hiatus (Part II)", they were stated to have married in April 1982, and Kelly (Mary Mouser) was born in July 1983 . He was unable to be at the birth of Kelly as he was deployed . Shannon, along with their eight - year - old daughter Kelly, was murdered by a Mexican drug dealer named Pedro Hernandez on the last official day of Operation Desert Storm . Gibbs was an active member of the Marine Corps at the time and was still overseas when they were killed . In "Hiatus (Part II)" Director Shepard tells Dr. Donald "Ducky" Mallard that Shannon had witnessed a murder of a Marine at Camp Pendleton, where Gibbs was based at that time . Shannon had identified the murderer as Mexican - born drug dealer Pedro Hernandez . Afterwards, Hernandez shot the NIS agent driving Shannon and Kelly in a minivan and the subsequent crash took their lives . Gibbs retaliated by seeking out Pedro and assassinating him in cold blood, leaving behind an empty shell casing as a message . This secret remained with him for 20 years until it came to light when Abby discovered the truth through a forensic investigation . </Li> <Li> Diane Sterling (Melinda McGraw), was Gibbs' second wife . After divorcing Gibbs she married FBI Senior Special Agent Tobias Fornell (Joe Spano). However, this marriage was only slightly more positive than her last, and ultimately failed . As she did with Gibbs, Diane drained Fornell's bank account when she left him . Fornell and Diane have a daughter, Emily . In the season 9 episode "Devil's Triangle", Gibbs tells Diane that he liked her--he always liked her, and still likes her . (Diane tells him their marriage fell apart because she was in love with him, but she could not compete with Shannon .) Diane is later shot dead by terrorist Sergei Mishnev (Alex Veadov) during the Season 12 episode "Check". </Li>

How did ncis gibbs wife and daughter die