<P> An abuser's ultimate goal is to make their victim second guess their every choice and question their sanity, making them more dependent on the abuser . A tactic which further degrades a target's self - esteem is for the abuser to ignore, then attend to, then ignore the victim again, so the victim lowers their personal bar for what constitutes affection and perceives themselves as less worthy of affection . </P> <P> Gaslighting may be experienced by victims of school bullying--when combined with other psychological and physical methods, the result can lead to long - lasting psychological disorders and even progress into illnesses such as depression or avoidant personality disorder . </P> <P> Gaslighting describes a dynamic observed in some cases of marital infidelity: "Therapists may contribute to the victim's distress through mislabeling the woman's reactions . (...) The gaslighting behaviors of the spouse provide a recipe for the so - called' nervous breakdown' for some women (and) suicide in some of the worst situations ." </P> <P> Gaslighting has been observed between patients and staff in inpatient psychiatric facilities . </P>

Where did the phrase cone of shame come from